FROM COMPANY SHUTDOWN TO NEW JOB AND MOVING TO NEW YORK
If you told me back in June that I’d be sitting here typing this out from a coffee shop in the NYC because I moved, I probably would’ve looked at you sideways. It’s been a minute since I last wrote to you guys, and honestly? It’s because I had to actually live through the storm before I could sit down and put it into words.
My blog is my house. It’s a safe space where we don't do fake perfection, where we don't judge, and where we are completely transparent. This is just like my socials, but I wanted to get a little deeper with you. If you’ve been wondering where I’ve been, so let’s catch up.
When Your Whole World Shifts in 24 Hours
After losing my job when Spirit Airlines shut down operations almost overnight, I had to think on my feet fast. I kept replaying this one Rod Wave lyric in my head: "Get out your feelings and get you a bag."
Meanwhile, I was deep in my feelings.
I had to find some kind of balance between processing depression and chasing my money. I went straight into survival mode because, quite frankly, it felt like I lost everything. I had to rebuild my life completely from scratch. And let me tell you, the struggle of grieving and grinding at the same time will hit you harder than just standing still.
The leasing gig with the temp agency didn’t play out long term. I lost my unemployment. To make ends meet, I started driving for Uber and Uber Eats, and I felt exactly like Issa Rae in season 3, episode 1 of Insecure. It was a massive hit to my ego especially for someone who has had her own apartment and everything together since she was 22 years old.
Now, there is zero shame in driving Uber; money is money. But I started to feel like I was losing my reality and my purpose. As an empath, doing rideshare wasn’t it for me. From the weird smells and venting passengers to weird men and obnoxious, triggering questions like, "So, did you ever get into a physical fight while working at Spirit?” it was just a lot.
No one really understood the emotional weight I was carrying, except for the 20,000 other people who woke up to that shocking email saying our beloved airline was ceasing operations. We lost a job we truly, genuinely LOVED despite what the public thought.
The Grind, The Rental Scam, and The Breaking Point
I eventually switched over exclusively to Uber Eats. It’s a hustle, so I was driving for hours, six days a week, alongside applying to every single freelance gig that crossed my lap.
Every single day I got into that rental car (which is an absolute scam, by the way), I prayed, I cried, and I sung my heart out to a different playlist. There were some really dark days. Days where I forced myself to smile, picked out a cute outfit, styled my pixie cut, tried to take solo dates in between driving sessions, and recorded my days just to find some motivation. It was just me, myself, and my back against the wall. That was when I realized everything was about to transform and that my chapter in Atlanta might finally be coming to an end. Maybe it was time to return to the Tri-State area (NJ/NY).
About a month before leaving for flight attendant training, I had a full mental breakdown after that Uber rental started garnishing my account. I remember talking to my mother, and she told me something I really needed to hear:
"You accomplished so much in your 9 years solo in Atlanta. You had several apartments, you used your degree, you became a flight attendant, you worked with major brands as a creator. It is okay if you are falling right now. You are not a failure; this is just a season. Atlanta will always be there."
Ego will have you thugging things out until you can’t even walk or breathe just because you’re trying to prove a point that you don't need help. But the truth is? Sometimes we do need help.
I try not to live by society's norms, but I found myself falling right into that mental trap: Who wants to start over in their 30s? Society tells us your 30s are supposed to be the years where everything is locked down, established, and heading in a straight, perfect line. Instead, I was hurt and embarrassed. I didn’t want anyone to see me "down bad" because I'm the girl who always has it together.
Eventually, I had to remind myself of the greats. There is no set timeline. I had to use this as a reflection not of my worth, but of a brand-new chapter dedicated to building something bigger and better.
Earning My Wings Back (With An Ex You Can't Just Forget)
Fast forward five months later: I started flight attendant training at the airline I really wanted.
When people DM me and ask what airline they should apply to, I always tell them the same thing: Read the contract. That contract is your lifestyle, and you have to figure out where you actually see your life in the next five years. I chose this airline and they chose me out of over 20,000 applications because of the culture, the money, the contract, and most importantly, the flexibility. Mental health matters, and flexibility is my non-negotiable.
I cried when Spirit shut down because I had to figure out where I belonged. What airline wouldn't make me feel like a robot? What airline would give me the energy and spirit to actually want to get up and go to work every day? What airline would encourage me to be myself while still being professional?
So when I finally got my offer letter and training date, it felt like weights was lifted off my shoulders. God knew exactly where I wanted to be.
Stepping back into flight attendant training five years later with a brand-new airline challenged me in so many ways. There were days I struggled not because I didn't understand the material, but because I had to completely unlearn everything I knew from my previous airline. They always tell former flight attendants starting somewhere new to "get rid of your ex." But as one of my former Spirit coworkers put it: It’s hard to get over an ex you didn't leave voluntarily. My "ex" died, and I was still grieving while trying to move on quickly with someone new.
My family didn't always understand the immense pressure I was under unlearning and relearning procedures, aircraft configurations, and a whole new airline culture in a space that moves quick. But in the end, that training gave me a new level of confidence. It taught me how to adapt, how to stay humble, and how to always remain teachable.
Coming back with new wings gave me a feeling I’ve been yearning for: true freedom. People always ask why I don’t go back to working a corporate 9-to-5 using my degree, and I always tell them: this job is addictive. It gives me a lifestyle and a freedom that corporate life never could. My current 9-to-5 is my lifestyle, and it still leaves me room to build in all the other creative areas that tap right back into my degree.
From Atlanta to NYC: How the Vision Shifted
Looking back, I sometimes laugh thinking about the 23-year-old version of me who packed up her car and drove 14 hours solo down to Atlanta. Back then, I was running and chasing a corporate dream. But man, that looks so different now.
Atlanta molded me into the woman I am today. It gave me a masterclass in independence. I really had to study the art of what it truly means to get to know yourself when you're living in a city completely solo-dolo. I learned how to decenter myself from men and step fully into my own power. I learned what it means to build my own world from the ground up.
As the years went on, though, I realized I was constantly fighting to stay deeply connected to my creative side which is why I made sure to get an apartment right in the middle of the city. It was doable, and it worked for me for a long time, but something was always missing. It didn't give me that pulsing, electric feeling of NYC city streets.
If we're being honest, Atlanta sometimes lacked a certain level of raw individuality you’d see a lot of people looking the same, and it didn't always spark that eclectic creative inspiration. But where Atlanta did win? It mastered the art of Black community. It’s Black people making something out of nothing, holding high-level corporate roles in major companies, and completely killing the entrepreneur game. Atlanta will always have an irreplaceable, special place in my heart. But for now? This isn't goodbye; it's a see-you-later.
I always laugh to myself thinking, Girl, you just gotta make a lot of money so you can live multiple lives in multiple cities, because each place feeds a different part of my soul. Being a Life Path Number 3 means I’m a creator through and through we are built to express, to dream big, to reinvent ourselves, and to never stay boxed into just one version of our lives.
Landing in New York & Rewriting the Rules
Leaving graduation and landing at LaGuardia Airport because New York is now my official home? That hit different.
I knew I didn't want to return to my mom’s house in Jersey. Jersey doesn’t give me the inspiration I need as an artist and a creator it’s simply home. For the people who truly know me, I am a city girl through and through. I love every aspect of the fast-paced life. I love walking down the street and getting inspired by the individuality of the city and even the unique fashion styles. Whether I'm on the train watching someone journal and vibe to music, or walking down the block and seeing someone live out their dreams from modeling and film to the everyday corporate guy grabbing a slice of pizza everything about this city inspires me to write, to create, and to tap into my inner self. It’s the exact same feeling I get when I’m solo traveling.
For the last two years, I’d fly up to visit my best friend in Brooklyn, and her running joke every single time was always: "The summer don’t start until Teeara arrives." She always complimented my aura and how I naturally attract energy when we're out from making new female friends to networking. She really got to see me in my element. I’d always tell her, "I think I'm coming back, but if I do, it has to be in NY."
Normally, I don’t live my life with fear, but this was one thing where I felt a little anxious. I felt the pressure of needing to "have it all together." But now that I’m here, staying with my cousin, I feel deeply inspired and motivated. I'm ready to restart my life, do everything I said I was going to do, and put myself out there for opportunities that will elevate me in the creator space.
If you’re out there feeling like starting over in your 30s is a setback, I want you to look at it differently. There is so much beauty and resilience in a plot twist. Let's break the societal norm that your 30s have to look like a picture of perfection. Sometimes, a massive breakdown is just the universe clearing space for an even bigger breakthrough.
